Gary Larson Depicted IT So Well...

Gary Larson Depicted IT So Well...

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How Gay?

Gay Topics:

How GAY

I want to keep my thinking right-on. 
Thinking straight is what got me into a lot of trouble for the first 34 years of my life.

To Homophobics

Do you hate what you don't understand?

You don't understand why or how 2 of the same could like the same. You hate that?  Do you actually understand:
  • The Weather
  • Geo-thermal Technology
  • Medicine
  • Botany
  • The Inner Earth
  • Oceanography
  • The Universe
  • ___________ . . .
Do you actually hate what you don't understand?
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The first time I learned than the world could toss you aside if it did not like what you did:     (1966)  In 4th Grade teachers changed. We started with Mrs. Payne, she left & Miss Arnote (our Teacher’s Assistant) took over. I remember when Miss Arnote sent two of us to her car trunk to bring in some boxes and we discovered parts of a Playboy Bunny costume. Because of 'our' discovery, (not from me) rumors began that she worked nights at the Phoenix downtown Playboy Club. Within a relatively short time, she was no longer a teacher at our school and our class received yet another teacher to end the year.


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Gay people simply seek acceptance to Love; they are not proponents of hate.
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Have you ever noticed, extremists of any nature, must have someone to fight? And if they find themselves without, they must find their enemy dujour.

It seems they exist to fight.

Has the religious 'right' forgotten their calling?

What about existing to spread Love?

Have they become the religious 'wrong'?

 Pen & Ink Poster
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The Pledge of Allegiance says, ". . . with liberty and justice for all." What part of "all" don't you understand?
Patricia Schroeder, politician
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"Everyone Starts Out As Straight!"
The Myth  –  that everyone is Straight – forces gay people to come OUT.
Can straight people imagine if everyone is assumed gay…what it would be like for them to come OUT as straight? Would they attempt to 'change their behavior' to be acceptable to us?

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No person is your friend (or kin) who demands your silence, or denies your right to grow and be perceived as fully blossomed as you were intended.
Alice Walker
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Life &  Love: We choose to do them together....  Where does sin enter this equation?

 Pen & Ink Poster
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Under what justifiable criteria can someone say that an entire segment of society deserves NOT to have the same rights, privileges, duties, freedoms as other members of society (remember, gays' only 'crime' is Loving another); and that is justification for segregation and removal of rights afforded to other members of society?

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Everyone wants to Love and be Loved by someone.

Who could be so cruel as to want to deny this for an entire segment of society...just because it's not the way they may choose to Love for themselves?

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…at her (Elizabeth Montgomery's) memorial service…a letter (was read). The writer identified himself as a gay teenager. …he had always loved Lizzie as Samantha on Bewitched because as he viewed it, Samantha was just like everyone else in her small town, except she was different. … The gay teen went on to say he found this portrayal personally empowering … because it gave him the means with which to survive his own life. … Empowerment, of course, comes when that inspiration forces you to summon up your courage and take position for yourself…. 
From Bruce Vilanch'es "Bruce"
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Everyone - everywhere is fragile. Many add lots of padding in attempt to protect; yet they are as fragile as everyone else.
HANDLE ALL WITH CARE.
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The next 2 paragraphs are taken from an email sent to one of my family members
prior to my return.
*
JUST LIKE THE CHILD WHO IS SMALLER THAN HIS FRIENDS, WHO IS NOT THE RIGHT COLOR, WHO HAS THE "WRONG" NOSE - OVER TIME, THE CHILD LEARNS TO REJECT HIMSELF BECAUSE OF HIS DIFFERENCE - EVEN THOUGH HE DID NOTHING TO INFLUENCE THE DIFFERENCE. GAY PEOPLE LEARN TO REJECT THEMSELVES BECAUSE SOCIETY REJECTS THEIR DIFFERENCE - EVEN THOUGH THEY DID NOTHING TO INFLUENCE THE DIFFERENCE.
*
TELL ME HOW IT IS ANY DIFFERENT THAN: THE OPPRESSION OF A RULER STIPULATING WHAT RELIGION MUST BE PRACTICED. HOW ONE MUST ACT WITHIN THE CASTE SYSTEM. HOW THE MISSIONARIES EXPECTED THE INDIANS TO HAVE SEX IN THE ACCEPTABLE 'MISSIONARY' POSITION. IN A HETEROSEXUALLY RULED SOCIETY, THAT STIPULATES WHAT YOU MUST BELIEVE ABOUT LOVE & HOW ONE MUST ACT TO BE ACCEPTED WITHIN THEIR HETERO-SOCIETY
& EVEN WHAT KIND OF SEX IS ACCEPTABLE?
*__________________________ 
 
*The MATTER OF CHOICE
* 
We can finally settle this matter of choice issue. Barring any further discussion with those who propose it IS a choice -- for us to propose that they could choose to be gay, if the general populace was, and it would be easier for them to "fit-in" with the majority if they'd simply choose to be gay - because they could ya-know!
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A final determination of whether or not gayness is a choice can be made simply: - Test ALL (or a huge random sample) Gay People's Intelligence AND IF it is conclusively determined that gay people are VERY LOW in intelligence, then it would make sense why they could make such a choice.
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Oops, then an entire new bag would be opened, are all "not-smart" (and there's a zillion of them) people latently gay; they just haven't gotten around to making the choice -- yet?
* 
Oops/Oops, IF gay people turn out to be just as smart, or even a tad smarter than the general populace, then would proponents of 'choice' say, "It's a smart choice"? Then, why haven't they made "The Choice"? This all sounds a bit absurd to me. About as absurd as proposing it's a choice.
SETTLED.
ELM
*_________________________ 
* 
He Acts So Gay . . .
*
"They Act So Gay" – Gay people are not as guarded; trying to preserve the image of macho-ism or feminism because, unlike straights who feel the worst thing they could ever be thought to be would be 'gay', gays are not concerned with hiding their other side. All of us have masculine & feminine traits and gays are not ashamed and fearful of their 'other' side.
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Premise, Gay men are made by horrible relationships with women: So if I had a horrible gay relationship with a guy, it could cause me to become straight? Ever thought the problem with some men's relationships with women is that the guy was gay in the first place and tried to 'play straight'?
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A sad thing that happens to gays their entire life until they 'come out': When best friends say horrible things about gays while in one's presence – the best friends don't realize they're saying those horrible things directly to, and about, the person they're with. Over time, many gays internalize all these horrible things as a part of themselves; feeding their own self-loathing.
ELM
*_________________________

*It Happened to Me . . .
*
Many think it's all fine as long as there's a comfortable distance from their loins.
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Have you contemplated exactly how you'd be with a child, niece/nephew, grandchild who happens to be gay?
*
What would you think of them?
How would you treat them?
What would you say about them to others?
How would you make them feel about themselves?
Would you believe they're going to Heaven along with you?
Would you expect others to treat them at least as well as you are treated? Would you join in efforts to help secure their full-rights to participate in society the same as you?
* 
One in ten of the people related to you IS VERY likely to be gay -- whether you know or acknowledge it. There are more gay people in the world than there are people with blue eyes (some are both blue-eyed and gay).
In other words, being gay is less rare.
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***
*
Being gay has nothing to do with sex.
* 
One is gay way before having sex; even if one remains a virgin.
* 
A hetero knows they are hetero prior to having sex and if they never have sex, they're still a hetero.
*


 Pen & Ink Poster
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It's about who you better relate to intimately (here, I'm not [at all] speaking of sexual intimacy), some better relate intimately with cats, instead of dogs; while others prefer horses or even reptiles - meaning that they better connect, understand, share intimate (not sexual) moments of caring/connection.
***
 
The "mainstream" could not accept that isolation is universal,
as is every individual's desire to bridge it with love and truth. In this sense we are all the same.  
(George Weinberg, Ph.D.) 
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The most damaging part of social oppression has never been the act of oppression, but the oppression we internalize within ourselves.
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It is utterly life-changing when a man sees the truth about the shame that has driven him and his constant, sometimes frantic efforts to avoid it. The avoidance of shame has shaped our lives, determined our careers, and chosen our lovers. Not until we acknowledge its power over us are we free to choose a different, more fulfilling life.
*
Allan Down, Ph.D.  "The Velvet Rage"
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Should we oblige them?

There are people, because of their upbringing, that expect not to be Loved. Should we oblige them?  -OR- try to show them that they should have experienced LOVE earlier?
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This Says It All


How can loving someone EVER be wrong?
IT CAN'T!
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Can You EVEN Imagine, if *we were in the majority?

*
If we* were in the majority, what would heteros feel if we condemned them and did what they've done to deter their interactions with one another?
_
In my mind, that alone should prompt the majority to remove all their enacted hindrances to our connections with one another . . .
_
...including marriage.
_
*GLBT people
*


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Reasoning with religious friends . . .


With my friend D (friends since the age of 9), we went back & forth - and he decided He Could Not Handle Being Around Me

From ELM: I am truly at a loss as to why you believe you have to see things exactly as I do to continue to treat me as a close friend. We do not have to see things eye-to-eye. If you are honest with yourself, you do not see ANYTHING exactly eye-to-eye with anyone else on this earth. You have your own way of seeing the things you think you see ‘similarly’ with your loved ones and friends.

WE CAN AGREE TO DISAGREE; THAT’S OK.

Please grant me the courtesy of reading your letter & then when you come upon a side-notation
(A); then read my applicable side-note.


-----Original Message----- 
From: D -- Sent: Thursday, December 06, 2007 -- To: ELM -- Subject: My Very Hard Decision - To Follow The Bible or To Accept My Friend's Lifestyle.

ELM, You don't get it. To accept your lifestyle
(1) means the Bible is wrong! If the (2)Bible is wrong here then maybe it is wrong about alcoholics, drug abusers, and adulterers(3). The biggest reason(4) I even try to avoid my past lifestyle is due to disobeying God and the consequences that will surely follow. Jesus said, "If you love Me then obey Me."(5)

(1) You were born a Caucasian – God made you that way – is that a lifestyle?
(2) Are you saying that you believe the entire Bible is wrong if there are any discrepancies? That belief would be very scary because I'm sure you've seen and questioned ones before. So to hold the belief that the whole Bible is wrong if any discrepancy is found causes you to ignore any discrepancy? So are you saying your faith is not in God but in the scribes who wrote the various books; later decided by other leaders what would be included in the many 'books' of the Bible (a compilation)?
 (3) Do you need a Dictator 'lifestyle' because you feel you'll run wild if you don't live under the rule of say, "They'll cut your hand off if you steal." So, only because they will cut off your hand – you won't steal?
(4) What about the reason that it doesn't serve you well; bring out the best in you? That you really don't want (in your heart) to do those things that go against the person you want to be?
(5) Love thy neighbor as yourself. Are you saying you can't hang around with someone like you?

If I give up on the Bible being true cover to cover then my faith will go(2). I then would want to live as I pleased(4) and not to please God.True, we are all sinners. To know the truth and to sin anyway is what displeases God more. The lady that got caught in adultery was later told by Jesus to go and sin no more. He forgave her sin but then told her to stop it.

I worked for two gay men today and have been there many times. I've worked for gay women a few times too. They are not openly confessing to know(6) Jesus(7)
and then saying that the Bible is wrong about homosexuals.
(6) How do you know?
(7) So, you only hang around with people who believe exactly as you do? What if you had Episcopalian, Methodist, Lutheran...friends who believe in Christ and see things about the Bible differently than you do? They can't be your friends unless they believe exactly as you do about all things? You are segregating me to be lower than all others you are "allowing" to hang out with you.

To know the truth and then to deny it as you have is the problem I have with you ELM.

I've attended many meetings with alcoholics, drug abusers, and sometimes wife cheaters, who stumble but keep getting up to try to put this lifestyle behind them. This is what incourages me(8).
(8) So, I need to be a drug, alcohol and prostitute abuser to encourage & hang-out with you?

Always your friend(9).
(9) It would have been easier had you not come to Yuma to reintroduce yourself into my life as a life-long friend...because now you're the one I'm afraid has bolted.

D
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From ELM: One last time going for reason > >
Firstly, are these your words or are you asking others to do your thinking for you? You're too old to not use your God-given head.

D, I think it's you who doesn't get it.



I love you and accept you with all your character attributes AND want to have you in my life
(and do things with you as a friend) – cuz I Love you and enjoy doing things with you.
*
**** **** **** **** **** **** **** **** ****
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What follows is a letter to another of my friends who holds the same extreme religious views to which I previously subscribed (after they sent me quite a venomous email).
*
G,
*
As the future unfolds, I hope you’ll come to a point of lessened venom.
*
It is sad that you would “expect” the worst.
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My behavior was unarguably despicable; the key word being “was”.
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Forgiveness is not within my control; it is also not for me as much as for those harmed…so they can stop reliving the pain and heal.
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I debated for years about ever returning (thinking for many more years that I would never return) because of reactions like yours – that it would be cruel to return and re-open unexplained (hopefully healed) wounds. After much debate, it was concluded that my return would help to bring closure and healing and that is very much a part of why I am here. I have received much encouragement that my return was warranted with regards to healing, recapturing love and closure.
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I sent the note only so you could know the instability that prompted the mindset for the ‘despicable’ behavior.
*
ELM
*
P.S. Only recently did I come to terms with acceptance from God and therefore acceptance of myself as a valid human worthy of my place on earth. Only recently, have I begun to accept myself and begun the process of loving myself. With this personal acceptance, I have decided never to allow anyone to enslave me again into hating myself.
*

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"Vengeance Is A Lazy form of Grief"

from the movie > "The Interpreter"
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Getting Me – Getting IT

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• Niggers, Negros, Coloreds, Blacks (*words they didn't assign to themselves) used to be told to act, look, speak...more like whites and they’d get along better in life**.

• Faggots, Homos, Queers, Gays ( “_*_" ) have been told to act...like they are not and they’d get along better in life*. **Over time – these do not prove true.

• The message of: conform to fit in – how “I perceive” you should be – eventually becomes very grating.

• Gays have spent too much time being told (and thinking) they are not how they “should” be. Eventually,
they stop listening to others who think they should be different than they are and they head toward health.

• That’s why ‘out’ gays are not inclined to be open to how others ‘feel’ they should be.

• I spent much of my life with a Savior Complex – subliminally thinking that by Saving others, maybe someday someone would stick up for, and save, me –OR– by “Saving” others, I neglected the attention needed to save myself and that’s why my life shattered.

• S says that he never wanted to play “that game”, which wasn’t his game – there’s no way to win someone else's game with their rules.

• When I first got together with
S, I was so intrigued with how comfortable he was in his skin – with whom he knew himself to be – yet he was very shy and socially insecure. I was the opposite and I wanted what he had inside.

• I was proud of how well I had played “the others’ ” game; by “their rules” for so long and how I had convinced “others” I was winning – while I was losing to myself. It was always such a challenge trying to choose the appropriate costume.

• Once the costume came off for good, S helped me to see that naked – myself – was so much more comfortable and not to be fooled into thinking “dressing up” for others would ever make me feel fulfilled.

• Coming from the extreme ‘right’ religiously and politically, initially, when
S would present new concepts or information to me, as quickly as possible, I’d categorize it as opposing my views and box it as ‘bad’; then I wouldn’t have to think about it anymore. Over time, because of S’s gentle ways, I realized that the concepts he relayed had value and were workable. I learned not to reject concepts simply because they were counter to my previous perceptions of how things “should be”.




I do not hold to one philosophy or teaching, much like the Vedas, this is generally my view:

Vedanta is a philosophy taught by the Vedas, the most ancient scriptures of India. Its basic teaching is that our real nature is divine. God, or Brahman as it is called, exists in every living being.

Religion is therefore a search for self-knowledge, a search for the divine within ourselves. We should not think of ourselves as needing to be "saved." We are never lost. At worst, we are living in ignorance of our true nature.

Vedanta acknowledges that there are many different approaches to God, and all are valid. Any kind of spiritual practice will lead to the same state of self-realization. Thus, Vedanta teaches respect for all religions.
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Allowing Gay People to Marry Would Impinge on the Family

The argument that allowing gay people to marry would impinge on the family, apparently, is the same argument espoused to not allow women's rights because allowing them to be equal would cause disintegration of the family. LET’S NOT FORGET THAT THE RELIGIOUS ‘RIGHT’ WAS (many still are) AGAINST WOMEN’S EQUALITY. They are wrong again; NOT speaking for God.

It’s hard to believe, in the twenty-first century, that the United States of America has yet to ratify the Equal Rights Amendment, first proposed in 1923, which would include women in the Constitution. Then again, back in the old days, they weren’t in a hurry to give women the vote, either. New Zealand and Australian women could vote well before their American sisters. One of the arguments trotted out at the time against women’s suffrage was the threat is would pose to the stability of the American family. If the wife supported a different candidate from her husband, it was felt that this would lead to dissension, divorce, the disintegration of the family unit, and the end of known civilization.

If, on the other hand, a husband and wife agreed on the choice of a candidate, well, the husband was already representing his little lady at the polls now wasn’t he?

Words have great power and a word like “sex” conjures up all manner of things in people’s minds. I believe that a simple change of the Amendment’s wording, substituting the word “gender” for the word “sex”, would have seen it be ratified.

How do we recognize sexism and how do we eliminate it from our lives?
Because our society has become more aware of racism, the usage of racist terms has become socially unacceptable. We now recognize the power that words have to divide us. Well, prejudice is prejudice in any form. If you are unsure as the whether or not a statement is sexist, all you have to do is give it the race test. Simply substitute “white” for “male” and “black” for “female”, and the prejudice becomes obvious. 
(from Helen Reddy’s memoir “The Woman I Am” © 2005-06)
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*
Also remember that the Bible is a book of books and rulers of the time decided which books to permit or remove from possible inclusion. Is it truly blasphemous to question some things that got "IN" and shouldn't have and vice-versa?
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Remember in the 1970s (and before and after) when many fundamentalist authors were writing 'end-times' books revealing their "Vision" of what would happen and even when. These were the same people who espoused that a 'false-prophet' is one whose prophesies are not 100% accurate. Where are they and their prophesies now? Were they true prophets or...?
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Throughout history there have been spiritual guides and writings (before and after the Bible); are they all to be trashed because they are not "IN" the Bible? Including all the teachings and "Visions" others have written about their take on what's said within it?
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Is God permitted to communicate to others through all the various means available to Him? Are we the ones in charge here to decide how He can get His message of LOVE through (which includes acceptance of all as His creation and that His Being empowers EVERYTHING)?
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http://www.psychologytoday.com/

The Big Questions

Life, death and free will.

Homophobic Men Most Aroused by Gay Male Porn

Homophobia Associated with Penis Arousal to Male on Male Sex

Even a man who thought that women want to have sex with their fathers, and that women spend much of their lives distraught over their lack of a penis is right sometimes. This person, the legend that is Sigmund Freud, theorized that people often have the most hateful and negative attitudes towards things they secretly crave, but feel that they shouldn't have.

If Freud is right, then perhaps men who are the most opposed to male homosexuality have particularly strong  homosexual urges for other men.

One study asked heterosexal men how comfortable and anxious they are around gay men. Based on these scores, they then divided these men into two groups: men that are homophobic, and men who are not. These men were then shown three, four-minute videos. One video depicted straight sex, one depicted lesbian sex and one depicted gay male sex. While this was happening, a device was attached to each participant's penis. This device has been found to be triggered by sexual arousal, but not other types of arousal (such as nervousness, or fear - arousal often has a very different meaning in psychology than in popular usage).
When viewing lesbian sex and straight sex, both the homophobic and the non-homophobic men showed increased penis circumference. For gay male sex, however, only the homophobic men showed heightened penis arousal.

Heterosexual men with the most anti-gay attitudes, when asked, reported not being sexually aroused by gay male sex videos. But, their penises reported otherwise.
Homophobic men were the most sexually aroused by gay male sex acts.

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8-5-11 USA TODAY - ...psychologists...supporting...

marriage equity...impact on the...debate.

Citing new research, psychology group supports gay marriage - By Sharon Jayson, USA TODAY - Updated 08/05/2011 8:27 AM 

WASHINGTON – The world's largest organization of psychologists took its strongest stand to date supporting full marriage equity, a move that observers say will have a far-reaching impact on the national debate. 
The policymaking body of the American Psychological Association (APA) unanimously approved the resolution 157-0 on the eve of the group's annual convention, which opens here today. 

The group, with more than 154,000 members, has long supported full equal rights for gays, based on social science research on sexual orientation. Now the nation's psychologists — citing an increasing body of research about same-sex marriage, as well as increased discussion at the state and federal levels — took the support to a new level.

"Now as the country has really begun to have experience with gay marriage, our position is much clearer and more straightforward — that marriage equity is the policy that the country should be moving toward," says Clinton Anderson, director of APA's Office on Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgender Concerns. 
The resolution points to numerous recent studies, including findings that "many gay men and lesbians, like their heterosexual counterparts, desire to form stable, long-lasting and committed intimate relationships and are successful in doing so." 

It adds that "emerging evidence suggests that statewide campaigns to deny same-sex couples legal access to civil marriage are a significant source of stress to the lesbian, gay and bisexual residents of those states and may have negative effects on their psychological well-being." 

Six states (Connecticut, Iowa, Massachusetts, New Hampshire, New York and Vermont) and the District of Columbia allow same-sex marriage. 

"Psychologists have been very important in helping to keep the discussion at a fact-based level and not let it steer off into stereotypes," says M.V. Lee Badgett, research director at the non-profit Williams Institute on Sexual Orientation Law & Public Policy at the University of California-Los Angeles. 

Sociologist W. Bradford Wilcox, director of the National Marriage Project at the University of Virginia-Charlottesville, says his board is divided on the issue and hasn't taken a stance on same-sex marriage. He says the APA resolution will likely have a broad impact. 
 
"I don't think it's very significant for the population at large, but I do think this move is significant for the ongoing public policy and legal battles in Washington and around the states," he says. 

Clinical psychologist Mark Hatzenbuehler, a Robert Wood Johnson Foundation Health & Society Scholar at Columbia University in New York City, whose new research is cited in the resolution, says the courts tend to look at these kinds of policy statements because "they're really looking to see what social science research says about the influence on gay marriage and marriage bans on a whole host of outcomes." 

Badgett's research of gay marriage across cultures is also cited in the resolution. She says the Netherlands was the first to allow gay couples to marry, and it showed "very little change in the overall society, but it was very important to gay couples themselves." 

The last APA resolution on sexual orientation and marriage was approved in 2004. The resolution notes that since that time, APA has worked on 11 amicus briefs filed in same-sex marriage cases since 2004. 

For more information about reprints & permissions, visit our FAQ's. To report corrections and clarifications, contact Standards Editor Brent Jones. For publication consideration in the newspaper, send comments to letters@usatoday.com. Include name, phone number, city and state for verification. To view our corrections, go to corrections.usatoday.com. 
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U.S. Justice Department has come out and said: 

'gays have been mistreated.' 

A large Domino has now fallen into all the others.

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The END of Second Class Has Begun

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